Muscle & Fitness - View topic - General Zombie Preparedness

Moderator **Joined:** 01 Feb 2007 **Posts:** 4041

SailorJerry wrote:

Well, I was thinking, ever heard of a zombie that could swim? Their decomposing limbs are probably to stiff and un-coordinated to swim well. Sure, dead bodies can float, but a quick jab with a sharp object would release their post-mortum gases. I suggest a swimming routine incase you take your survival to the maritime, and maybe you can jack a sweet yacht as well amidst all the apocolyptic chaos.

Myth: Zombies can float

Fact: Zombies cannot swim or float, but CAN walk on the bottom of bodies of water like they're just walking on land. Because they don't need to breathe, they take take their sweet time until they hit another land mass and walk right up onto the beach. Or a shallow-enough part of said body of water to wear they can reach up and grab someone who thought they could swim, or in a small boat.

I've got a friend with a boat, so I'm not too concerned about this, though.

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Everybody spends half their time wishing for something that they could have, if they didn't spend half their time wishing.

Moderator **Joined:** 01 Feb 2007 **Posts:** 4041

Woop. Back from a three-day weekend in Daytona. Desperately needed it. Last week was AWFUL. There was a lot of Jager. A lot of Jager.

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Everybody spends half their time wishing for something that they could have, if they didn't spend half their time wishing.

Moderator **Joined:** 01 Feb 2007 **Posts:** 4041

Missed class tonight, which feels awful.

So I'll post about my weekend.

FRIDAY MORNING:
Wake up, myself, my boo-tay, my closest friend, and his boo-tay head to Wal-Mart to stock up on provisions (SNACKS) for the drive up. We get into the car. We put the females in the back and we put in a CD and we get on 95. Eventually we get to my parents' house which is on the beach. Not ON the beach, like the hotel you imagine when you think of Daytona, but it's like, right there. I can throw a rock into the ocean from their driveway. We unpack, relax a little, then bring out the bottle of Jagermeister so big, that it requires a pump.

A pump?

A f**king pump.

There's also several 4-packs of AMP. So it was.... "Jaga' Bombs! Jaga' Bombs! Jaga' Bombs. Hey, chief: Jaga' Bombs." This lead to cigarette smoking on my part, which is the only part of the weekend I regret.

Slept a few hours, woke up on Saturday. Girls went shopping, guys watched Farting Preacher on Youtube, which I highly recommend. That afternoon we went out to eat, and to get more hooch. The girls (who are the only ones who are 21) come out of ABC with f**king Parrot Bay coconut rum and Patron. So we go home, and do double-shots of tequila. It was alright, I guess, if the plan is to get as bombed as possible with as little enjoyment and time required. I had enough after 3 or so. Than after dinner (burgers 'n' brats, burgers 'n' brats) we got into the rum. As a rule, I never drink anything out of a blender, but I might as well have with this girly sh*t. Coconut rum and pineapple juice. After 2 of these I traded up to Vodcrap. I think we invented this. It's Vodka and Cran-Apple. Is that still girly? Yes. But not as much, and tastes a lot better. Fireworks. More smoking. More fart humor. Slept less than the night before. Woke up, donuts, beach. More vodka at beach. Swimming. Tanning. Swimming. Tanning. My buddy refused to dig a hole with me. @sshole. I love digging big holes at the beach. Then we went home, showered, packed, hit the road. Stopped at Moe's Southwestern Sh*t or whatever it's called. Went home. Spent.

Here are some things I discovered this weekend that I think you'll all like. I discovered them during the wee hours of the morning with the females asleep and nothing better to do than YouTube obnoxious sh*t with my buddy.

Slap Chop

Shamwow

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_4a4O7kXQo&feature=related (Rest in Peace, Billy)

Big Shitty Slider Station

Orange Glo

Farting Preacher (Go to the bathroom and pee before watching)

Slap Chop Dub

Description:

Viewed:

564 Time(s)

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Everybody spends half their time wishing for something that they could have, if they didn't spend half their time wishing.

Moderator **Joined:** 01 Feb 2007 **Posts:** 4041

MMA last night after a little layoff.

Worked on a takedown variation. Worked with this guy who does not know how to drill, and it pisses everyone off. It's like he's going live every time. He'll take you down, but then try to get mount or something when he's just working on technique of the takedown and that's it. Also, when you're trying just to learn technique, he'll defend. It's like "Wtf, man, just let me learn the takedown, you @sshole." So because he's always trying to get mount or get a submission or whatever, I decided to try to get mount on HIM after I took him down, he flipped over, gave me his back, and I sunk in the rear-naked choke. And it felt amazing. I did not want to let go. Idiot.

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Everybody spends half their time wishing for something that they could have, if they didn't spend half their time wishing.

Moderator **Joined:** 01 Feb 2007 **Posts:** 4041

FIGHTING FITNESS

Every time Mike isn't there and Din or Ray lead the class, I miss Mike.

Warmed up with some light stretching and a nice long plank

1 Round of 20 Pushups + 50 Jumping Jacks + 20 PUs + 50 JJs + 20 PUs + 5o JJs.

That's one round. 60 PUs and 150 JJs is one round. Luckily it was the only round of that.

Next "Round" was this.....

Ab Wheel of Death from Knees x 1 minute

Forearm Wrist Exercise Thing x 1 minute (nice break)

Head Kicks on Thai Bag, Alt Legs x 1 minute

Windshield Wipers (not the ones we know, a different kind) 95 pounds x 1 minute

Neck Bridges x 1 minute

BW Squats Not on Swiss Ball, but that half-swiss-bal-on-a-plastic-platform-dealie x 1 minute

One-Arm Cleans, Alt Arms, 50lbs x 1 minute

Holding 30lb Dumbells at 45-degree Angles Up and in front of you, guillotine position x 1 minute

What we on this board know as "Windshield Wipers" x 1 minute

Rest.

Next "Round"

30 seconds of your quickest 1-2's, every 10th punch as though you're trying to knock a mo'fo' out, then 30 seconds off. (this was a nice break) We did it for 7 minutes.

With a partner holding up his hands as targets, 1-2 sprawl x 2, rest while he 1-2-Sprawl's twice. Ray was very motivating. Telling us not to stop, telling us that we're burning out, this is going to be the worst part, we SHOULD feel like we're going to puke, it's good for us, 1-2 Sprawl

1-2 Sprawl

1-2 Sprawl

1-2 Sprawl

1-2 Sprawl

I couldn't stop, Din was looking at me, telling me to get those hips on the mat

1-2 Sprawl

1-2 Sprawl

I'm nauseous.

1-2 Sprawl

1-2 Sprawl

1-2 Sprawl

Fried.

One guy made it to the bathroom, one guy ran outside.

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Everybody spends half their time wishing for something that they could have, if they didn't spend half their time wishing.

Moderator **Joined:** 01 Feb 2007 **Posts:** 4041

Haven't updated in a few days. Sorry. Been busy as sh*t.

Had open mat on Saturday. Tapped some, made some tap. Also got in some Fighting Fitness-type cardio with medicine balls and dumbells.

LAST NIGHT:

MMA, we worked on something I already knew and loved. From sidemount, to scarf hold. I worked many an americana last night.

Submission Grappling, we worked on multiple escapes from when some dumb sh*t has you in that non-technical, "school yard" bully headlock. Not hard to escape from. The guy I partnered up with didn'tk now how to drill for #### and almost blew out my f**king knee more than once. These scrubs come in, and leave soon. So he'll be gone shortly.

Tonight was Fighting Fitness. I will not type out the whole thing because I don't have much energy left and I want to talk about something else.

I'm changing my schedule next week. Right now it's.....

Monday: MMA, BEGINNER GRAPPLING
Tuesday: FIGHTING FITNESS
Wednesday: MMA
Thursday: FIGHTING FITNESS
Saturday: OPEN MAT

It's becoming.....

Monday: MMA, BEGINNER GRAPPLING
Tuesday: FIGHTING FITNESS, LIVE GRAPPLING
Wednesday: MMA, LIVE GRAPPLING
Thursday: FIGHTING FITNESS, LIVE GRAPPLING
Saturday: OPEN MAT

Also, my thoughts are with Rev and his family. This is the worst kind of tragedy I can imagine. Two years old. What constitute prayers in my agnostic mind as I try to decide whether I believe or not, are with them. Nobody should have to bury their child.

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Everybody spends half their time wishing for something that they could have, if they didn't spend half their time wishing.

Living Legend **Joined:** 17 Mar 2004 **Posts:** 15170

homo

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" there isnt a magically rep range per se....its what you feel comfortable in doing by and large.....its gaining 50-200lbs in that same rep range progressively over months and months of time thats going to do the magic"

-Doggcrapp

Moderator **Joined:** 01 Feb 2007 **Posts:** 4041

jerzey wrote:

homo

That was uncalled for.

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Everybody spends half their time wishing for something that they could have, if they didn't spend half their time wishing.

Site Admin **Joined:** 16 Jan 2009 **Posts:** 480

Hey, Dom!

This is completely off topic, but who is the guy in your Avatar picture?

Sorry, I don't follow UFC or MMA or any of this stuff so just because I should know doesn't mean I do.

Muscle Head **Joined:** 08 Aug 2005 **Posts:** 2627

helenyeoman wrote:

Hey, Dom!

This is completely off topic, but who is the guy in your Avatar picture? �

Sorry, I don't follow UFC or MMA or any of this stuff so just because I should know doesn't mean I do.

Helen: His avatar picture is Georges Saint Pierre (GSP) - UFC Welterweight Champion and legitimate all around scary bada$s athlete and fighter.

Dom: I would like to remind you that while training BJJ/MMA and ONLY while training BJJ/MMA is it ok to use the words "rear naked" and "felt amazing" when referring to another male. Very Happy

Keep up the training...it will be the toughest mental and physical "thing" you will go through if you're doing it right. You will get all kinds of "Billy Badasses" coming in and leaving within 20 minutes. I've seen guys leave during the warmup after telling everyone before class about their "3 years in the Marines" or how many street fights they have won. No offense intended towards anyone in the Military, just stating what I've heard many times.

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Olympia God **Joined:** 16 Oct 2004 **Posts:** 4810

brian23 wrote:

You will get all kinds of "Billy Badasses" coming in and leaving within 20 minutes. I've seen guys leave during the warmup after telling everyone before class about their "3 years in the Marines" or how many street fights they have won. No offense intended towards anyone in the Military, just stating what I've heard many times.

That's the truth. It's always entertaining though. I like to try and identify the exact moment that they realize that they're outclassed. Very Happy

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Moderator **Joined:** 01 Feb 2007 **Posts:** 4041

Let me just add, Helen, to Brian's statement, that the reason I have this avatar is because I was sure that Thiago would beat this guy down, and made a bet with Sal (BroncosFan). So. I'm with this until Sunday. Meh.

Brian, it's only gay if you make eye contact, if I understand correctly.

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Everybody spends half their time wishing for something that they could have, if they didn't spend half their time wishing.

Moderator **Joined:** 01 Feb 2007 **Posts:** 4041

Heading to Open Mat. Bada-Bing.

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Everybody spends half their time wishing for something that they could have, if they didn't spend half their time wishing.

Moderator **Joined:** 01 Feb 2007 **Posts:** 4041

So there's a few guys I train with regularly, we all train together. We all go outside the circle from time to time to learn something valuable from someone more experienced than us, but for drilling and live grappling/ sparring, we stay to ourselves being that we're all basically the same skill level. I've come to the conclusion that my ground game needs a lot of work, a lot. I win some, I lose more than I win. But it's not all bad, because my striking is kind of the shizzy nizzy. Nobody sees that head kick coming from me, not sure why. They're always surprised I can do it. Not anymore, I've lost the element of surprise, but yeah.

To sum up, striking (and all aspects of striking) is a little ahead of where the other guys who started the same time as me seem to me.

Grappling's a litte behind.

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Everybody spends half their time wishing for something that they could have, if they didn't spend half their time wishing.

Olympia God **Joined:** 16 Oct 2004 **Posts:** 4810

Domenic wrote:

So there's a few guys I train with regularly, we all train together. We all go outside the circle from time to time to learn something valuable from someone more experienced than us, but for drilling and live grappling/ sparring, we stay to ourselves being that we're all basically the same skill level.

This is stupid. Drill and roll with anyone and everyone. Over time it will benefit you a lot more than just sticking to a few people that you're used to. The guys I've seen who are afraid to roll with anyone but the few people they are comfortable with do not progress well. That's been my experience/observation.

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